Crushing depression.
I am in the middle of a crushing depression. I had somehow convinced myself recently that the only thing wrong with my camera was a problem with the firewire cable. That if I went out and got an analog capture device that everything would be fine. Well today I did. My wife and I had to pool all of our money, scrapping together $50 to get one. Only to find out that it wouldn’t work either. the only way I can make any good money right now is by making videos for Howcast. If I can’t make those videos I can’t make money, if I can’t fix my camera or buy a new one, I can’t make money. I don’t have the money to fix or buy a new camera. and even then If I could make money right now I should be using that money to pay bills. I am in a vacuum of hope, desperately holding my breath. If I breathe out the eyes will get sucked from my head and my lungs will explode. I wish that I could be more professional then this here. This is supposed to be for my business. But then I guess a film maker without a camera doesn’t have a business. I will be back. I don’t know when. I am not going to die unless god strikes me down in his mercy but I don’t thin I am that lucky.